It is 2:45 AM on Christmas morning. No my children did not wake me up this early, well sorta. ViviAnne woke me up for a drink and I can't fall back to sleep. We had a wonderful Christmas Eve with Brent's family. It was just the immediate family so there was not all the chaos of cousins and such but it was exactly what we needed this year. Both the kids have been on a Christmas high all week with gifts arriving daily since Sunday's visit with PeePaw (my Dad). And it has been wonderful to watch their excitement and joy over the presents and celebrating the coming of our Lord. Every night I ask ViviAnne why we really celebrate Christmas and give presents and she responds with "Because it is Jesus' birthday. And because we love him." It warms my heart to know that she is beginning to learn and understand the true meaning of Christmas.
She has felt wonderful all week! And knowing what I know about her treatments I'm in amazement as to how?!? But she has been on this toddler Christmas high and it is wonderful and a bit exhausting at the same time!
So, in these wee hours of the morning I felt compelled to tell you all that she is feeling great and Brent and I are both feeling blessed and relieved that our Christmas is turning out the way that it did, not in the hospital or with her in the bed.
During my night prayers I was so thankful and grateful to God for her health and Cooper's health and all though they have different levels of healthy I am thankful. I just kept telling God thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you for Jesus so we may know you and thank you for my wonderful family and thank you for Mary. Now, this last thank you just kinda popped out and so it gave me pause. "Thank you for Mary?" I thought. I am not a Christian who focuses a lot of attention on Jesus' Mom nor do I put faith into her being able to answers prayers so where did this come from. But I went with it and really it is true. How wonderful of a role model for me as a Mom. To have your soul break for you child and be frightened for their life. I know she had faith that far surpasses my own but she was also a Mom. And so I wonder when Jesus was born, born to die, did she hold him tightly in the night while he slept and ask to take His place? Knowing the pray was futile but praying it the same. I think she did. Because that is what I do at night. Knowing God will not give me her Cancer but I pray it anyway. Oh how I long to take her place. Take it all away. Mary HAD to feel the same way, she just had to. So yeah, thank you Mary for being a wonderful role model.
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
5 comments:
Hi i am so glad that you have a had a lovely week with the children and that Vivianne has felt well. I have just celebrated my chrismas with my 6 month old grandaughter Rowen and she really made me remember the true meaning of christmas. It is not about gifts but about time spent with loved ones so I am glad that you got the chance to spend it with all of your family. with prayers and my thoughts love Vivianne from England xxxx
How very moving, Kristen. Your words about Mary brought tears to my eyes, but your message that Vivianne is having a good week brought warmth to my heart. We love you all and hope that the coming days and weeks are positive as well. Love, Sara, Ryan & Alexandra
Hi Kristen. I'm Sharon, Ryan's mother and Sara's mother-in-law. I am so glad you have had a good Christmas. I have been following your blog for quite a while and you are always in my prayers. I, too, have often thought of how Mary must have felt. I have always heard that a mother's love is the closest thing on earth to God's love. I know I have even wondered how God could love my children as much as I do (silly, huh?) I know I can't begin to understand all you have been through but I believe 2009 will be better for you and your family. God bless you all.
I am also moved by this entry, WOW - you have amazing faith and I'm thankful that God blessed you with a wonderful Christmas!
I pray that 2009 will be one filled with lots of hope as ViviAnne continues the fight of her life!
Those words were from somewhere so deep in the heart...I was hooked...I couldn't look away. God will honor your faith as you look to HIM and think of Mary's bravery through fear. ViviAnne and Cooper look so precious in the pictures you posted. Thanks for sharing them!
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