The past few weeks have been great! Don’t misunderstand me there have been plenty of squabbles between the kids and me fussing at each of them but we have truly been blessed! ViviAnne is enjoying school and comes home every day with smiley faces (their form of grades) and only a few “needed a reminder” faces but those are ALWAYS for talking. She has been 100% with her helping others, following directions, learning prayers and language skills SO I can deal with the talking because I figure the other stuff is where it really counts! Her temper seems to be getting a bit better too. Sure she has her freak outs and melt downs but she is 4 and we are working on it. But I cannot tell you how incredibly happy and overcome with joy that she is where she is today!!! I could not even see this place a year ago. I longed for it but I did not truly understand the meaning between having a “normal” child and a “sick” child till now! She is still sick but she is getting to do “normal” things and loving it!!
I asked her last week if she had told any of her friends at school about her port, and she responded with “No” and a look like “are you nuts?” Then I asked if she had told anyone at school that she has Cancer, to which she said, “NO” again with the look of are you nuts. So I explained she did not need to tell anyone at all I just wondered and there was no need to talk about it with her friends at all. She just went on back to eating her lunch and never said another word about the subject. I think she knows she is different with her Cancer and her hair (all though it is too cute) and she just wants to keep it under wraps. I can’t say that I blame her.
Today she was explaining to her Daddy and me that her hair MOVES NOW!! Like in the wind when she rides the horses on the play ground. She was VERY happy about it. Too funny how much she takes in, it is no wonder she is wound a bit tight with her temper. She has been through hell and back and has no idea why or how to cope so she just loses it when she doesn’t understand simple things now. Everything is a threat I guess. But, like I said, we are working on it.
At Dance tonight she was so sweet. When I told her she was starting dance today she just smiled the biggest smile and said, “Will I get to use my ballet back pack and shoes?!” I have learned not to tell her things until maybe a couple of hours before it occurs because she just gets so worked up. And in cases like this she would imagine all the things that she would like to happen and if it didn’t play out like she had in her head then she gets upset. I guess we are all a little like that but I just keep her on a day to day schedule except with school. It works better for her little mind. ANYWAY, when we went to ballet she did everything the teacher asked and smiled and would sneak a quick wave to me every now and then. At the end of class a little girl had an “accident” and ViviAnne rushed over to her, put her hand on her back to comfort her and had this very worried look on her face because of the girl crying. To which ViviAnne says, “she just needs her Mommy” as she pats the little one on her back. All the other little girls just kinda stared but ViviAnne ran to the rescue! It was so sweet to see her concern for her.
I did have to leave the room at one time because I started to cry and there I was again being the emotional Mom but this time I got away from people BEFORE the tears fell. I watched her walk on her tip toes in a line across the room. I watched so closely as just 11 months ago this was one of her physical therapy moves because she did not have the strength in her legs to walk well. She sort of swung her right foot around and the left was very unsteady. And to see her do this nearly across the room was just over whelming to me. To see how far she has come and to know that no other girl in this room (THANKFULLY) has had to travel her road was just a lot for my heart to bear. I was thankful. Thankful she is here today, thankful Cooper is happy and tearing the place up like a normal 2 year old boy, thankful that today she has not relapsed and even though she is tired it is from her “normal” life not her “sick” life!! Thank you, God, for getting us through this battle! Even though the war is FAR from over I feel victorious today.
2 comments:
Hi, I belong to Northeast and I've posted once or twice before. I have followed the blog ever since you all started it as this little girl and your family have touched my heart. Our last name is Brown, so I see ViviAnne's tag at church hanging down just a few tags from Kendall's. I look at it and think of and pray for you all. I have been overjoyed the last few times I've been to church as I have seen this sweet little girl in the flesh, playing at church. When this horrible nightmare began, I just longed for her to beat it and wanted her to be able to do normal kid things such as play at church with kids her age. It's really awesome to see her doing these things that were once robbed from her. She probably thought I was crazy, last Wednesday Kendall was in the same room as ViviAnne and I just kept looking at her and I gave her this big huge smile .. and the sweet thing just waved to me and said "Kendall your mom is here!" I just wanted to give her a big squeeze and tell her I was so happy to see her playing at church. But, instead I just smiled and I thank God for these moments!
I have recently come across a company that dedicates itself to helping children understand medical conditions like Leukaemia, through comic books and entertaining media. Because of the lack of medical resources out there for children, MediKidz educates children about health conditions in their language and at their level. These books have really helped my family and I, and I truly recommend you all looking it up at medikidz.com
My best wishes for you!!
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